DCFemella

Mother’s Day 2009
Originally uploaded by dreamingindc

I was happy that my grandmother was able to attend Isabelle’s graduation. However, i could sense that she wasn’t her usual self. She was quiet, serious, and didn’t interact with us. My mother took me to the side and told me that my uncle in Panama had a heart attack, and that my grandmother was worried sick. We both knew that if something were to happen to my uncle, my grandmother would not live. She had already endured the death of my aunt and her younger sister (who died in April), so I don’t think she could live if another child of hers passes away.

My mother told us that she was having anxiety attacks, and that she couldn’t walk two steps without almost fainting. My sister and I urged my mother to take her to the ER before she got on the plane that night to back to Panama. I called this morning, and my grandmother had severe high blood pressure and water retention. The doctors gave her medicine that helped. She is now in Panama. I can’t help to think that if she would have gotten on that plane, she probably would have died.

My cousins, sisters, and I are lucky that we’ve had our grandmother for this long. I remember being a little kid and hearing a lot of my classmates saying that their grandparents were dead. It didn’t make sense to me because I had both grandparents living at the time. My children are lucky that they have their great-grandmother here with them, and they are able to enjoy all this time with her that others never have been able to have. I want two more children, and I want them to know their grandmother as well. Even thinking about the day my grandmother leaves this world, gets me all choked up. I know that all of us eventually leave this world, and my grandmother has lived longer than many people, but it’s still hard.

Just give me a few more years with her. That’s all I ask.

Diana Reeves’ “Better Days” reminds me of mi abuela