Who Wears the Pants: Your Kids or You?

Posted by dcfemella | Posted in children, family | Posted on 20-06-2009

View Comments

Spoiled

Originally uploaded by brettitaya

Parenting is trial and error. You try and figure out what works and what doesn’t. Since I was pregnant with my first born, I have read every parenting book that has come out. I wanted to make sure that I was the best possible mother. As every parent, there have been mistakes that I have made, but I learned from them and tried to not repeat them again.

My sister called this morning saying that she is really upset with my ten-year old niece. She reprimanded her about something, and my niece started talking back and slamming things. Her fiancee and her told my niece to stop, and she kept doing it. My sister spanked her and my niece started yelling at her. She is sending her to sleepaway camp with equestrian lessons, and then throwing her a birthday party when she returns. I told her to cancel the birthday party because it’s too late to cancel the camp. She hesitated.

“Should I?”

“YES!”

She said that she knows I am right, but she would lose $100. I told her to lose the money, and make my niece pay for it doing extra chores and not getting her a birthday present. My sister said that she asked my daughter Isabelle, who is at her house, the following question:

“Do you know why Kayla got in trouble?”

“Yes, cause she talked back to her mommy,” Isabelle answered.

“Do you think that is bad?”

“Yes! Cebastian and I NEVER talk back to mommy because we would get in TONS of trouble.”

She said that she sees how different Cebastian and Isabelle are compared to her children, now that they are with her. My sister has never watched my kids. This is the first time she has ever had the with her for longer than a day, so she is finally seeing the differences on how her kids behave and mine. My niece and nephew don’t help her clean, talk back, and don’t respect her the way they should. Even with this, she gives them whatever they want and defends them when they are rude. When they are with me, they don’t act the same way. I used to think it was because children usually behave one way with their parents than they do with others, but it’s cause they no that I don’t play.

I told my sister that she needs to understand that she is not doing her children any justice by giving them everything they want, even when they don’t deserve it. If I were her, I would make that girl realize how it would be if she didn’t have everything that she has now. I know that I am a strict parent, but I want my children to not be brats, now and in the future. I hope my sister learns that as well and stops spoiling her children.