Tulip Festival 2, originally uploaded by vijayal.

Dear Readers,

Today is “Open Letter’ Thursday, which is an idea that I got from my Cali girl Katie. Definitely check out her blog. It’s very well written and straight from the heart.

I miss gardening. This is the only part that I miss from living with my ex.  Before then, I never even wanted to step foot in my parents’ garden. When I had my own, I was constantly adding flowers, shrubs, and even trees.  The smell of the lavender; knowing that spring has arrived by the tulips and daffodils; and knowing it was summer by the sprouting of purple flowers coming from the hostas.

Now, I live in a condo, and I don’t have the luxury of planting and growing my own plans.  All I can do is admire the ones around me.  Sometimes I remember the life I used to have before the one I have now, and I have to say that I feel like a seed that is slowly blooming into a beautiful flower that can withstand anything.  My life has been full of changes, and like plants I have found a way to grow and push through the weeds.

Thinking about it, I guess I am gardening my life.  I guess that is good enough until I can have a backyard full of flowers.

Write an Open Letter on your blog, and include a link to Jiggety Jigg.

The secret admirer, originally uploaded by dougellin.

I am at work counting down to when I can finally cut out and head to Isabelle’s Kindergarten graduation when I get a call.

“Hello?”

“Is this Shevonne Polastre?” says a husky voice at the other end of the phone.

“Yes?”

“Hi, I have some flowers for you.”

I am somewhat hard of hearing (I need subtitles when I watch movies), so I thought that I heard wrong.  Also, I have never received flowers, except once.  I was 19, and my date gave me a single rose on our first date.  Therefore, it has been a long time.

“Excuse me?”

“I am at your house, and I have some flowers for you.”

“Oh! Err…ummmm…could you leave them in front of my door?  I’m at work” I responded.

“Ok, will do.”

We exchanged goodbyes, and I am left here wondering who sent me flowers?  I went through the usual suspects.  I contacted the ones I still talk to, and they all said no.  This feeling that I have is something that I haven’t felt since high school.  The giddiness of a secret admirer who secretly worships you without ever revealing who he/she is.

There is one person left, but I seriously doubt that it’s him.  The last time we communicated was his goodbye email to me saying that he was done with our relationship.  It took me awhile, but I have finally come to terms that it is over, and now I get these secret flowers?  Is it him?  Is this his way of apologizing?  No, I felt when I got that email that it was finally the end.

Then who is it?  In a way, I hope the card is blank or is signed “Your Secret Admirer,” so I can keep this feeling.  It will probably be the last time that I feel this way, and I don’t want to lose it.