My kids are obsessed with silly bands. Every time I pick them up, I hear them talk about how they got this and that silly band from this or that friend. It has become a sort of status symbol.  Who has the most silly bandz rules the school. If you don’t have school-aged children or your kids haven’t been infested with this crazy, you are probably wondering, “What in the world are silly bandz?”  They are colorful rubber band-type bracelets that are formed into different shapes. You can get some that are shaped into different animals, ice-cream treats, even the wild west.

Today, while my son and I were at the bookstore, there was a huge display of silly bandz. He yelled, “Oooh!” and quickly ran towards the hundreds of silly bandz. While he oogled all the silly bands he didn’t have, I saw a father there searching through the packs. I let Cebastian look at them while I searched through the book stacks nearby. After 15 minutes of looking through the silly-band packs, the father calls home. The conversation (no joke) went like this:

“Hi honey, I wanted to know what kind of silly bands you wanted me to get you for our trip.”

Child on the other end.

“Honey, are you sure that your friends will like those? Will you be able to exchange them?”

I was shocked. I didn’t know that they were that important. My son begged me to get Isabelle and him their own package, so I decided fine.  While in the car, I remembered an episode of Disney’s “Recess.” In it, there were these cards that the kids would exchange.  Here is the episode, which is called “Economics of Recess,” if you have never seen it:

It made me think of two things. The first is what was the big thing when I was a kid.  What did we exchange amongst each other? I honestly can’t remember, but I do remember the boys would exchange baseball and football cards. However, when it comes to the girls, I don’t think there was anything.

The other thought was that is this a way to teach children about money and power? The first thing Isabelle said when she jumped in the car was, “Oh! Now I can have more people doing what I want!” Is this teaching them that the more money you have, the more power you have? It’s just like that Recess episode.  The more cards BJ accumulated; the more he was able to have the kids do what he wants. Is this the way to teach kids about economics?

I wonder how long these silly bandzs are going to be passed around by school-aged kids. It might be like Recess, and in a month, another type of crazy will occur.

If You Have to Cry, Go Outside: And Other Things Your Mother Never Told You by Kelly Cutrone

My rating: 3 of 5 stars
I have always been a fan of “The Hills,” and then Whitney Port’s spinoff “The City.” One of the characters who I loved the most was Kelly Cutrone. Her tell-it-like-it-is attitude and being a smart business woman was two of the things that I loved about her the most. It even made me love her even more when I started watching her Bravo show “Kell on Earth,” and I found out that she was a single mother. Being a single mother who has her own business, I knew that this was a book that had to be on my must-read list. Yesterday, while waiting for Isabelle, who was doing her tutoring session, Cebastian and I went to the bookstore. I saw her book, and I picked it up.

It is a very easy read, and I read it that night. Cutrone talks about her venture to New York City and her journey to becoming the powerhouse that she is today. It was interesting to know that even she had her dark moments and was able to crawl out of them to become more enlightened and amazing than she was before. I realized that powerful women are not born that way, and you always have to fight to have the things and people that make you happy. Her book made me realize that you always have to remain positive, and when negative thoughts enter your head, it’s your job to make them go away. One technique that I am going to use is when a negative thought like “I can’t do this” pops up, I am going to go through every worst-case scenario because it’s like Cutrone said, you usually realize that you will still be ok.

I will bring up the negative now because the other positive I got from the book is a big one. One thing that I hoped for was more tips and lessons that she could give the readers. However, she mainly talked about her Goddess, and I was left thinking, “Ok, so what are you trying to teach me?” I felt like the majority was about finding your own religion. Maybe for someone else this will enlighten him/her. However, for me, who has already read and researched many religions and has created her own thoughts on religion, I kept wanting more.

The second positive is a big one, like I said before. One thing that Cutrone said that resonated through me is you really have to sit down and think about what you really want; not what you were raised to think you want. I realized that since I was little, I’ve always wanted to be my own person, have children, and be successful in my business ventures. However, I never really cared about having anyone by my side. Even when I would play different stories with my sister and friends, marriage was not in the equation. I had someone I loved, but it never worked out in the end. When the kids were babies, while my older sister and mom were pushing me to marry their father, I never wanted to. I would tell them that I didn’t believe marriage was for me. Slowly, I wanted to get married, but I realize now it’s due to the pressures around me. Having this whole “perfect family” life with the white-picked fence is not my dream.

My dreams are for the kids and me to travel all over the world. Learn about life, enjoy spending time together, and just having a blast exploring the mysteries of the world. It’s  the life lesson from this book that I am thankful for.

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Last night, my 17-year old nephew called me very sad.  It broke my heart.  One thing that I never want any of my kids (including my niece, nephews, and little cousins) to experience is pain.  If I could, I would transfer all their sadness to me, so that they could live without feeling sadness.  I know that is something that can’t happen.  The only way that we become the people we are meant to be is by experiencing everything that life has to offer.  However, I can still wish it wasn’t so.

One of my favorite songs of all time is Regina Belle’s “If I Could.” It’s how I think every parent feels.  Wishing that they could shield their children from any harm and pain. When I heard my nephew cry, I began crying as well.  I felt his sadness and it made me feel so helpless that I couldn’t do anything.  I know that I can’t do anything else but listen to him, and I know that is probably all that he needed at the moment. 

Listening is something that you have to learn as a parent.  You want your kids to feel comfortable to come to you whenever they are in trouble and/or need someone to talk to.  More than likely, they don’t want your advice.  They just want you to sympathize and listen to them vent. I’m glad that I am able to at least do that for them.

Nothing de-stresses me more than sitting down and watching my kids play and explore. I smile at their innocence and ability to use their imagination to play for hours even if they are just jumping on a rock.

Since they were toddlers, we would take walks in the woods, and I would pretend that I saw the magical creatures in movies, like “Princess Mononoke.” Watching them makes me realize there is still something about this life that is still worth it.

It’s been a rough year but by just watching my children play, I know that I will one day know happiness again.

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BEFORE REMODEL:

From My Condo – BEFORE and AFTER

From My Condo – BEFORE and AFTER

From My Condo – BEFORE and AFTER

AFTER REMODEL:

From My Condo – BEFORE and AFTER

From My Condo – BEFORE and AFTER

From My Condo – BEFORE and AFTER

Thoughts?