One of the jobs that a parent has to fulfill is making your kids feel like they are the most special people in your life. You want them to feel that if someone wrongs them, you will be there to fight for them. They should know that you are with them every step of the way.

It’s something I try to do. My kids know that I am there for them, and that no one is as important in my life as they are. It’s something that my parents never made my sisters and I feel. Since we were small, we have felt that it was us vs. the world. If someone bashed us, our parents would look the other way. If they compared us to someone else, it was usually that we didn’t compare.  We never felt protected or truly loved by them.

I don’t want that for my children.  I don’t want their self-esteem to be affected because they think I don’t love them the way a parent should. I don’t want them looking at other parents with a look of wanting cause they see the difference on how they are with their kids. Or feeling less cause all I can talk about is how awful they are and constantly putting them down with other people. Or treating us like enemies when they are fighting, and only becoming united when they were angry at us.

Nope, my kids will never feel that way. I won’t allow them to feel the way that my sisters and I have felt my entire life.

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Time flies, and this summer goes with it.  I had a great time with the kids, and so I have no complaints.  It’s funny, but I always started itching the feeling that I wanted to go back to school right about now, and I can tell that they are feeling the same way as well. I know that it’s going to be a busy time. Cebastian will be in Track & Field, and Isabelle will be doing tennis.  I’m going to try and not overextend myself, which is something that I usually find myself doing.

The kids left for sleepaway camp for a week yesterday.  I woke up today feeling like I was missing something, and then I realized that it was the kids. It hasn’t even been a full 24 hours, and I already miss them. 

Everyone keeps saying, “Well, you can now have a break.”

It’s true, but they are at an age where they don’t really bother me. Yes, they will occasionally bicker, and Isabelle is a champion whiner. However, I love hearing their voices, and feeling their presence in the house. Now, it feels empty, but I am trying to keep busy and not think about it so much. I do think that Hagi, my cat, can sense that the kids aren’t here because he is attached to my hip.  I’m so glad that he’s here with me.

My kids are obsessed with silly bands. Every time I pick them up, I hear them talk about how they got this and that silly band from this or that friend. It has become a sort of status symbol.  Who has the most silly bandz rules the school. If you don’t have school-aged children or your kids haven’t been infested with this crazy, you are probably wondering, “What in the world are silly bandz?”  They are colorful rubber band-type bracelets that are formed into different shapes. You can get some that are shaped into different animals, ice-cream treats, even the wild west.

Today, while my son and I were at the bookstore, there was a huge display of silly bandz. He yelled, “Oooh!” and quickly ran towards the hundreds of silly bandz. While he oogled all the silly bands he didn’t have, I saw a father there searching through the packs. I let Cebastian look at them while I searched through the book stacks nearby. After 15 minutes of looking through the silly-band packs, the father calls home. The conversation (no joke) went like this:

“Hi honey, I wanted to know what kind of silly bands you wanted me to get you for our trip.”

Child on the other end.

“Honey, are you sure that your friends will like those? Will you be able to exchange them?”

I was shocked. I didn’t know that they were that important. My son begged me to get Isabelle and him their own package, so I decided fine.  While in the car, I remembered an episode of Disney’s “Recess.” In it, there were these cards that the kids would exchange.  Here is the episode, which is called “Economics of Recess,” if you have never seen it:

It made me think of two things. The first is what was the big thing when I was a kid.  What did we exchange amongst each other? I honestly can’t remember, but I do remember the boys would exchange baseball and football cards. However, when it comes to the girls, I don’t think there was anything.

The other thought was that is this a way to teach children about money and power? The first thing Isabelle said when she jumped in the car was, “Oh! Now I can have more people doing what I want!” Is this teaching them that the more money you have, the more power you have? It’s just like that Recess episode.  The more cards BJ accumulated; the more he was able to have the kids do what he wants. Is this the way to teach kids about economics?

I wonder how long these silly bandzs are going to be passed around by school-aged kids. It might be like Recess, and in a month, another type of crazy will occur.

Last night, my 17-year old nephew called me very sad.  It broke my heart.  One thing that I never want any of my kids (including my niece, nephews, and little cousins) to experience is pain.  If I could, I would transfer all their sadness to me, so that they could live without feeling sadness.  I know that is something that can’t happen.  The only way that we become the people we are meant to be is by experiencing everything that life has to offer.  However, I can still wish it wasn’t so.

One of my favorite songs of all time is Regina Belle’s “If I Could.” It’s how I think every parent feels.  Wishing that they could shield their children from any harm and pain. When I heard my nephew cry, I began crying as well.  I felt his sadness and it made me feel so helpless that I couldn’t do anything.  I know that I can’t do anything else but listen to him, and I know that is probably all that he needed at the moment. 

Listening is something that you have to learn as a parent.  You want your kids to feel comfortable to come to you whenever they are in trouble and/or need someone to talk to.  More than likely, they don’t want your advice.  They just want you to sympathize and listen to them vent. I’m glad that I am able to at least do that for them.