Awhile ago, I spoke about how my daughter Isabelle was not doing very well in school. I’ve tried everything that you can think of: flash cards, workbooks, extra time reading, doing extra homework, etc., and I still see that she is behind. When we read a word, and we see it in the next sentence, she freezes and doesn’t remember what it is. It became more apparent when we started the Odyssey of the Mind team meetings. Two boys on the team are both in first grade, and they are reading on a higher level than her. I started to worry. I finally knew that it was time to act when she got her second report card, and had a lot of Needs Improvements. I spoke to my family about it, and my sister said that she went to the Sylvan Learning Center when my nephew was having issues with reading. I made an appointment that day.
We went to the assessment this past Saturday, and went yesterday for the results. As I expected, she was found to be reading lower than her expected reading level. They said that she had no issues with reading comprehension, but that her reading needed to catch up. Therefore, I worked with them to tailor a program, so that by the time first grade is over, she will be ready for second grade.
It is a little expensive, but when I read how much private tutors are, I realized it was comparable to hiring someone who would come to my house. Also, detecting and fixing the problem early will be better than waiting til she is in sixth grade, and reading at a third-grade level. I was a girl once, and I know how hard it can be. If I can make it easier for her, then I will do anything I can.
That’s the thing about being a parent. You want your children to have it better than you did, and it doesn’t how much it’s going to cost. It is especially hard when you are living in an area where everything is so competitive. Parents shuffle their kids to 3-4 extracurricular activities, while holding full-time jobs. The kids are expected to be the best, and their schoolmates even pay attention to their progress. Money isn’t a problem, so the parents spend whatever it takes, so their kids have a higher chance of success later on in life. It’s something that my ex doesn’t understand because he has never really been a father.
Even though people tell me what is the point of keeping him abreast of what is going on with the kids, I still try. I am hoping that one day he will wake up, and be the father that the children need (and want). I called to see if he would contribute to her tutoring. He said that I need to try and work with her more with workbooks and flash cards, and that is too much money to spend. The old me would have started ranting and yelling. I would have told him that it’s easy for him, who barely sees the children, to tell me to help her more at home because he doesn’t have to do it himself. I would have continued on saying that he can go on all these trips and events with his friends, but as always, when it comes to his kids, he starts coming up with a 1,000 excuses why there is no point to pay the money. It’s easy for someone who has barely paid for a birthday party, their extracurricular activities, or anything extra for the kids to tell me what needs to be done.
The older and “wiser” me just said that it’s fine if he doesn’t want to pitch in, and that I will deal with the tutoring expenses on my own. I left it at that. It felt good not to start this tug-of-war with him on something that he will never get. My family is right. When the kids get older, they will realize how much their mother has done for them, while their father hasn’t contributed to much of anything. I am glad that I am getting her this help. I already see how sad she got when Cebastian was jumping with joy on getting all these Oustandings and Goods on his report card, while she only got Satisfactory and Needs Improvement. By the time second grade starts, Isabelle will be reading way beyond her reading level, and she will not feel as though she is nothing less than what she is really is. A super smart kid.
