DC Men, Wake the F* Up

19 September, 2008 | dcfemella | Comments

I don’t know if I can do dating anymore. I started dating again after taking a two-year break, and after a month, I’m ready to give up. The DC dating scene is probably one of the worst in the country, and I’m tired of trying to find a decent guy. This area is full of pretentious, career-obsessed, emotionally unavailable freaks who say they want a relationship, but in reality, they really don’t.

Ever since the dot.com boom of 2000, this area hasn’t been the same. As a native, I have seen how it has changed for the worse because of all the transplants who have infested the area. Now it seems that the following has happened:

  1. Men do not want any type of relationship until they are in their forties
  2. Women are having children when they are in their late thirties because they don’t want to screw up their careers
  3. Everyone has gotten uglier (I had to throw that one in there to see if you wee paying attention, but it’s true)
  4. No one cares about their appearance anymore
  5. Everyone is so detached

I want to put on “Suicide Club” for them, so they can understand that we don’t always have to be so disconnected from life. It saddens me that this area has become this way. Maybe other areas have as well, but I don’t live there. Even guys approaching girls has changed. It seems they only approach the easy targets because they don’t want their egos to be hurt. I don’t care for me, but I have seen my pretty friends who have guys checking them out, but they never come up to them. Later, you will see a Missed Connection on Craigslist. What do I think? Pathetic.

I posted a Yahoo! Personal ad to see what happens. I’ve had a bunch of guys who didn’t check out my preference. My checklist isn’t that bad anymore. I read this book called “Unhooked Generation” that opened my eyes. However, I still have one or two things that I prefer. Finally, I had three potentials that I was excited about.

  1. The TV Producer decides he is moving to California, but he still wants to date. I’m not wasting my time, so that didn’t last.
  2. The Lawyer was a strange character. I’m weird, but he took weirdness to another level.
  3. The Scientist disappeared.

Talking to my other friends, it seems to be the trend. They either plan to move after the first date; they are different in person than their Internet persona; they never contact you again; or they are so focused on their career that they never have time.

I’m disillusioned, and I’m getting tired of this DC dating scene. I was talking to one of my best friends who lives in Kansas City. She was saying that down there guys want to get married and have children in their late twenties. We both deciphered that it’s cause they are more family oriented than the DC breed. When I went to Arizona, I was pleasantly surprised that there were young families everywhere.

I have decided that if I want to find a man to have a long-lasting relationship with, I have to either move away or find a guy who is older than 45. I am not wasting my time anymore. Last guy I wasted my time with turned out to be married, to my horror. I find this out after I Googled him for the first (I’m a Google before the first date believer now), had fallen in love with him and planned our wedding in my head. I just wonder how he was able to spend weekends and weekdays with me without his wife figuring out what was going on.

Do I want to find myself in that situation again? No!

Men in DC, here are a few tips for you:

  1. Do not post an online ad when you plan to move or your career takes up 86% of your time.
  2. If you just got out of a relationship, or are still in one, wait at least six months before you start finding someone else.
  3. Be a man and just tell the woman that you are just not into her.
  4. Stop being so disconnected and learn to compromise
  5. If you see a girl you find attractive and interesting, approach her. The worst she can say is “I’m not interested.” Take the blow and move on to someone else.

I am going to give myself one more month. After that, I’m going to go on hiatus for another two years.

DC Men, I dedicate this song to you.  Korn’s “Wake Up,” Chipmunk Style.

Wake Up

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Categories: dating, rant

This entry was posted on Friday, September 19th, 2008 at 5:16 AM, and last modified on May 7, 2009 at 6:59 PM. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your site.

  • You're right. It seems to be women as well. If she can pay her own dinner, then what's up with that? =P

    I think people need to be more honest about things. You won't feel like you're wasting your time. you know?
  • I'm one of the recent (Feb) transplants you mention, and I think that dating in *is* different in DC. Everyone here is just so cool and distant. I'm used to, after 2-3 dates, at least being able to tell whether she's interested. Here people are so "whatev." If she's not interested, why would she accept another invitation? If she is interested, why not act like it? And these are women who can afford to buy their own darn dinner, so it's not that.
  • @homeimprovementninja -

    I have dated men who were in their 50's. I was just saying that as an example. The height use to bother me, but now I honestly wouldn't care how tall a guy is, as long as he is a sweet guy. I just prefer a guy over 5'9, but I think I have matured enough not to care.

    I think you are right about a lot of things that you said, and I probably would have thought you were talking to me two years ago. However, Ms. Party Girl doesn't frequent the clubs, and I actually do the things that I want to do. Men have never approached me, even in my party phase, so I don't go to functions expecting anyone to hit on me. I do it to enjoy my time.

    Thank you for responding! I like what you had to say.
  • Maybe part of the problem has to do with your limiting beliefs and negative attitude. You don't want a guy who's 45, and you don't want someone under 5'9"...do you think there is no 30 year old who's ever found a great relationship with a 46 year old who's 5'7"? You said that men don't want a relationship until they are in their 40s. Do you think you'll find someone in their 30s who wants to settle down if you believe that they don't even exist?

    Instead of being so focussed on dating, if you just went out and enjoyed doing the things that you like to do (hiking, going to art galleries, wine tastings etc.) with no thought about getting a man, you would have better results. When someone sees you doing something you like, you give off a positive vibe which attracts people. Just think about if you find yourself more attracted to the guy who is out with friends having a good time, or the guy who's in the club going from girl to girl because he won't leave until he gets a phone number. jus' sayin'
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